me too bracelets  a support group in a bead

Last year we were featured on the new Discovery Channel show, NOW or No
Opportunity Wasted with host Phil Keoghan.  The show is airing on Discovery and Fit
TV. (schedule)  We were given three thousand dollars and 72 hours to do something
we've always dreamed about.  Phil thought up the idea for NOW after surviving a
near-death experience in a scuba diving accident.  Unfortunately our father didn't have
a second chance to make a list of dreams, but we are sure that he accomplished many
of his goals and he certainly lived life with no regrets.














Our father drowned in a terrible scuba diving accident just a few days after his 50th
birthday, two days after his 27th wedding anniversary, and only one week before we
were all set to embark on an epic backpacking trip across the Rocky Mountains.  We'd
been dreaming and preparing for our "Colorado Fix" all year.  Unfortunately our Dad's
dive buddies and instructors were not there for him when he needed and requested
their assistance, and he was abandoned in an out-of-air emergency in a deep cave.  
We want to help spread the message of how important it is to check the backgrounds of
your dive instructors to see if they've lost any students in their past.  It is not their
obligation to tell you.  Had Steven known a little more about his company there is a good
chance he could still be alive today.  Because our father died this way we've not only
had to confront the emptiness in our hearts, but also deal with the anger we have for
those who we feel contributed to his death.  

When we flew home to Missouri, just one day after Steven's death, we found maps
spread across the kitchen table-- I could picture my dad sitting there, plotting our course
and figuring out which permits we would need to pull to stay in the most beautiful,
remote campgrounds.  When we went to our bedrooms, we found the slick new sleeping
bags that he'd been telling us about for weeks.  The heartache was and still is
indescribable.  It just wasn't fair, he wasn't supposed to leave us then, or ever.  He was
so strong and full of life, how could he be so instantly and permanently gone?

Desperate for something to help us trigger his presence, we ran into his bedroom and
threw ourselves into his pillow, hoping to capture his smell.  My sister, mother and I lost
our biggest love on August 23, and we knew life would never be the same.

Sarah and I submitted a video to NOW asking them to help us live out one more of our
father's dreams-- to travel to Hawaii, a magical place where the mountains meet the
ocean.  One more adventure, together with our mom (in a surprise twist), culminating in
the scattering of his ashes.  They surprised us much later with a bunch of cameras and
a whirlwind of emotions.


































For a long time we were convinced we would never be happy again, and that's actually
a big reason we began me too bracelets.  Not just as a project to help in our healing,
but something that we strongly believe would have helped us deal with the pain when we
needed comfort and sympathy from others the most.  

Sometimes just dealing with the stresses of everyday life is just too much to handle
when you are already fighting the biggest battle of mankind-- losing unconditional love.  
There was actually a time when I came close to having a t-shirt printed that said, "Hey,
be nice to me, I just lost my father!"  We've got a long way to go, this is only the
beginning of working to make this world a kinder place.  Slowly, we will open eyes and
hearts and reach out to others with the message to live life with no regrets.  Be more
understanding, and maybe even take that extra step to ask "why" the next time you see
someone struggling.  Like they say, the pain will never lessen or go away, but what does
change is the way we learn to deal with it.  For ourselves and for others.

-stephanie